Hello! Welcome to the Monkey Mind Newsletter where we provide you with the tools to be a more successful and resilient athlete and human. 

TOPIC
Maybe That Setback Was A Setup

Ever had one of those days where everything goes wrong? You spill your coffee on yourself, hit every red light, and then your coach/boss/random stranger hits you with some “constructive feedback” you definitely didn’t ask for? Yeah… fun times.

It’s easy to feel like life is happening to us—like we’re at the mercy of bad luck, tough breaks, or frustrating situations. But what if we flipped that? What if every challenge was actually happening for us, not to us?

This week we’re talking about reframing setbacks. Because sometimes, the thing that feels like the worst possible outcome… is actually exactly what we needed.

Flipping The Script

“Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.”— T. Robbins

• A basketball player I worked with got benched. He was frustrated, convinced it was unfair, and spent practices overanalyzing every mistake. The more he focused on what was “happening to him”, the worse he played.

• I asked him to change his perspective and consider how being benched might be happening for him (and of course he looked at me like I was crazy at first).

• In all seriousness, I wanted him to look past the emotion of it all and get curious about the situation he was finding himself in.

• Instead of sulking, he used his time to analyze the game differently. He watched the small parts of the game, learned from others mistakes, and when he finally got back on the court— he played smarter than ever.

• He didn’t just get his spot back. He came back better.

That’s the shift: Every setback carries an opportunity— if you’re willing to look for it.

3 Questions to Consider

1. What is one challenge I’m currently frustrated by?

2. If I believed that this was happening for me, how would I see it differently?

3. What can I get curious about to turn this into a learning moment?

One last thought: Life isn’t throwing obstacles your way— it might actually be clearing a better path. Trust the process, adjust, and keep moving!

CONTRIBUTOR
Kelsey Gustafson, M.S., Mental Performance Coach

Kelsey is a mental performance coach and the owner of the Mental Ascend & associate at Champion Mindset Group. She is dedicated to helping athletes develop the mindset needed to compete at their highest level—consistently and confidently. She works with athletes, coaches, and teams through 1:1 coaching, team workshops, and leadership development, providing practical strategies that enhance performance under pressure. In addition to running KGC LLC, Kelsey also works as an independent contractor at a private practice in Michigan, expanding her reach to support athletes at all levels.

With a Master’s Degree in Sport & Human Performance and personal experience as a collegiate volleyball player, Kelsey understands the mental demands of competition firsthand. She works with a wide range of sports, including Basketball, Baseball, Cross Country, Field Hockey, Football, Golf, Gymnastics, Lacrosse, Swim & Dive, Soccer, Track & Field, Volleyball, Wrestling, and more.

Kelsey’s customized approach helps athletes sharpen their focus, manage pressure, and stay locked into the present moment. Through her training, athletes learn to recognize mental traps, develop resilience, and recover from adversity with confidence.

She believes that while many factors contribute to an athlete’s success, the defining difference between a good and a great competitor is their dedication to the mental game. Those who invest in their mindset gain the edge needed to perform at an elite level—both in competition and in life.

Kelsey partners with individual athletes, coaches, and directors to build mentally strong teams that thrive under pressure.

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